I started a 14 day trial account 13 days ago and today purchased an annual subscription which should reflect the absolute and instant addiction to this game.
When your on a mission in Eve, it's not like if you die your avatar is spawned at some virtual grave yard were you just run back to your corpse and all is well again. (Like World of Warcraft)
In Eve, if your ship gets blown up, you not only loose your ship but any cargo it holds, all of your ships modules and add ons that you purchased from the in game market or were rewarded by completing various agent missions.
And if your actual "self" or avatar gets killed you stand to loose all the skills you have spent 12 hours a day for days/weeks/months developing.
Lets put it this way, being "podded" in Eve is that much of a likelihood and fear for a player you can (and should) buy insurance for your ship.
I took out insurance when I was prompted by the rookie tutorial but could only afford 60% so it's with much trepidation I undock out of each space station.
The immediate attraction to Eve concerns me because it's been years since I was so drawn to an escapism like this and I don't know if the game has become a much needed distraction in my life or it's just a very compelling game which distracts me from my normal day to day working routine. (and that's the issue here for me)
I am a "doer" I want things done yesterday, a typical Type A personality and I have come to realise I cannot control sales they swing up and down with a will of their own it seems and I cannot find the "key" to why people from all over the world all decide to start and stop spending money.
I find it ironic that for 2 years I have been driven like a woman possessed to make new textures in a bid to keep our heads above water to now find during a period of personal low productivity, sales have increased by 15 - 20 percent, the first long term sales increase in over two years.
I had always attributed good sales to new content, so if there is no direct connection between my work load and the amount of sales... wheres my incentive to keep creating?
Also, having recently moved from a Windows PC to an iMac and Photoshop CS3 to CS4 (which makes me feel like I am wearing someone else's skin) and this has prompted a creative block.
I can't seem to get my act together. I literally open Photoshop and stare at the monitor.
There was a time when I was so worried with the continued loss in sales during this historic recession, I would be pushing myself and working from 8am to 3 am, pushing plans and changes and spending money to improve search and navigation at the store or making new textures each and every day.
Friends have called me a texture machine due to the rate I would create texture sets, with a new collection created almost every day.
So, to find I have created very little recently and sales have increased makes me wonder if I even need to be there. What difference do I make?
Sure, we have over 90,000 textures now and some might say the 5 years of hard work has now afforded me time to relax a little. But if you snooze you loose as the saying goes and I never sit back and take sales for granted. You have to improve your skill and quality of stock to stay ahead of the game. Long gone the days when there was only a hand full of good texture stores and we were one of only a hand full, it seems everyone and their dog is making and selling textures in SL these days.
These days SL is that big with many stores and new members that when I stand in my own store customers sometimes approach me asking "do you work here?"
They have no idea I own it.
So, in light of all of the above, sitting around my home with no sense of control or direction leaves me feeling bored and depressed which of course leads to a creative block and worrying about a creative block becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.
My routine has all gone to crap and I have no creative ambition anymore. So thats playing on my mind as it's my drive to succeed that got me where I am today, but anyway, lol enough of my anxious rambling and back to Eve...
Eve requires a Hell of a lot of initial learning and researching and your often left stuck with a mission way above your skills and your ships capabilities.
I have lost 9 hours of my life I'll never get back today alone. But the things that hold you back in Eve are the same things your driven to overcome.
Eve can be annoying as Hell leaving me feeling blind and alone to the point I want to log out vowing never to return.
But then like a woman possessed, "The Lord Jesus Christ compels me!" and I am logging back in for another 6 hour shift.
I have unfinished missions (which if left unfinished will really mess my progress up) because I don't have the correct ship equipment or high enough skills and all of that is fine IF I knew which skills I needed and what ship add ons I should obtain.
The learning curve of Eve makes Secondlife.com look like a walk in the park and World Of Warcraft a joke in all honesty and the fact new none paying members do not have access to the official forum has got to be the strangest decision ever.
Eve is definitely a "grown up" game were practise, patience and above all tons of research is an absolute must to succeed.
Like most games I play, I suspect Eve is just a novelty for me right now and the shelf life will pass in time and my creative drive and ambition returns to my previous level because nothing compares to the pleasurable pastime of creating digital art when your hearts in it.